Monday, November 4, 2024

Oct. '24

 Late Night With The Devil ★

  A lazy clout-chasing found-footage hackjob that so wishes it could be Ghostwatch. There's some lean-in-and-grip dialog and the cast has great chemistry but every engaging conversation is cut off at the knees by some stale attempt at Horror; every trick in the demon possession book is employed here. Even worse: the 'documentary' aspect, especially the behind-the-scenes footage, all feels so gimmicky and unearned. There's also the unforgivable use of A.I., the ugly cgi, and an insultingly predictable twist. Nearly every aspect of this movie reeks of laziness.

Milk & Serial ★★★

  Though a little far-fetched at times (and I don't mean Realism), this is one hell of an admirable accomplishment. Made on an $800 budget, propelled by a twisty script, engrossing pacing, good suspense, and impressive performances, this YouTube indie short about gaslighting is also a portrait of ambition in front of and behind the camera (both diegetically and non-diegetically).

Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things ★

   Speaking of low-budget filmmaking: I got virtually nothing out of this. It looks terrible (when you can actually see anything), the zombies aren't scary, and the hangout aspect is so boring because the characters range from punchable to boring. That said, there's a moment at the end that gave me an unexpected jolt, and while that was too little too late, it has stuck with me.

Behind The Mask: The Rise Of Leslie Vernon ★½

  Starts strong! It's funny, creative, and sometimes admirable (especially the scenes with Scott Wilson, because I couldn't look away) but it deflates around the end of the the second act because it gives in to the genre trappings it was making fun of. The entire third act is Zzz...and I don't remember the ending, couldn't remember to save my life. Put a gun to my head, I'll have to die.

Azrael ★★½

  Held my attention but it never felt like it got going. Aside from a couple of bits, the tension is almost non-existent and, in a thriller, that really sucks a big one. The lack of dialog ends up feeling pointless and it doesn't look great, either. The ending is kind of interesting? If anything, it ends where it should have started. That said, Samara Weaving is typically fantastic and I like some of the world-building and practical effects.

Stowaway (v/h/s/beyond) ★★★★★

  Every Halloween season we get a v/h/s sequel and they're usually an assortment of highs, lows, and in-betweens (except last year's v/h/s/85, which was the series' most consistent). This year's, v/h/s/Beyond, has three stinkers and three highlights, so they broke even. Two of those bright spots are Mike Flanagan and Kate Siegel's STOWAWAY and Live And Let Die. Stowaway is a segment so literally outstanding that I was fucking rapt, so much so that I forgot it was a v/h/s segment. When it ended and cut to the frame narrative, I impulsively shouted "DAMNIT!" because I could have watched an hour or two more. In fact, it might be my favorite segment of the entire franchise and we're seven movies deep. Even the concept of this being Found Footage is unpacked because what was on the tape prior, and the decision to record over it, is important to our character's journey. Taking advantage of desert dusk gradient, infrared settings, and zero gravity, Kate Siegel's direction is a marvel unto itself, giving us one of the most visually interesting entries in the found-footage subgenre. She finds so many ways to keep things fresh instead of the typical mounted GoPros or Shakey-Cam or cheating with a multi-cam set-up. The sound design is also gorgeous, utilizing shimmering glitter and thunderous chimes, so while the script is incredibly horrific, there's a great contrast between what we see and hear in the confines of this tragedy.

Live And Let Dive (v/h/s/beyond) ★★★½

  The potential is limited to the anthology format but what they do with their slice of the runtime is so entertaining: skydivers cross paths with a UFO and it leads to a brief creature feature. There's some monster CGI that doesn't look great but the initial skyfall is so thrilling and the plane explosion feels so authentic. The eventual setting—an Orange Grove in broad daylight—is so inspired and unexpectedly unnerving. Every tree looks the same so it becomes a kind of labyrinth and the oranges are so slightly surreal that it makes the horror more nightmarish. And, with the chaos of falling debris and screaming people whose parachutes never opened, there's added tension on top of the extraterrestrial monsters scurrying around. It's a short full of good ideas, one after the other, and they consistently payoff.

Tales From The Darkside: The Movie ★★★

  Been putting this off for years and it was...fine, for the movie that's been dubbed Creepshow 3 I wasn't impressed (Cat's Eye is a better nominee for Creepshow 3). The real star is KNB Effects for their monster, their mummy, and the gore. All three stories left me wanting more but the effects work made me perk right up. There's so much potential in the three of them (especially the last two) that isn't fully capitalized on. The second one, Cat From Hell, creates a fun dynamic of Assassin vs. Assassin but it's much more fun on paper than in execution and that sums up the whole thing.

Kenny & Company ★★★½

  Affable coming-of-age indie that goes down nearly every avenue you'd expect but so many sequences are fucking delightful, in particular a bit where a kid gleefully points a gun at his gym teacher's head and pulls the trigger. Don Coscarelli explores death in such a straightforward way and you can see the seeds that would sprout into Phantasm. Something I appreciate the most about it is that it's not nostalgic for a bygone era, it's a snapshot of its current time and place. I see it growing on me in the future because we have virtually no Halloween hangout movies.

Lady In White ★★★½

  Starts off like A Christmas Story for Halloween but then takes a turn into a pretty bleak murder mystery that goes to some uniquely uncomfortable places (one moment toward the end I would love to forget but seriously doubt I will). It's a bit of a mess, both tonally and narratively, with unsatisfying loose ends. But it still has potent fall atmosphere, incredibly charming family moments, effective suspense and some wonderful performances. I just wish it had been more cohesive and had better visual effects.

Little Sister ★★★★

  This a nice, breezy family dramedy based around Halloween that is aptly referred to (by the 5 people who've seen it) as "John Waters meets John Hughes." There's nothing spooky or supernatural or even remotely scary here, it's just a bunch of people realizing they suck which, yes, is what's actually scary.

  It's the kind of movie that I wish was a TV show instead because a movie's runtime guarantees that any ending is unsatisfying. The characters are all so well-drawn but they're all so interesting and...well, I enjoy being in their company and selfishly feel entitled to more laughs and tears with them.

Something Wicked This Way Comes ★★★★½

  After searching all over (as it's not streaming anywhere and out of production on physical media) I finally got to see this. It's not only one of the most autumnal movies I watched this season but there's a threatening magic to it as every moment cascades into the other. There are also some...almost... proto-Flanagan monologues here about aging, death, and the regrets that mold our hearts. The acting is typically great from this cast (Jonathan Pryce and Jason Robards always deliver and Pam Grier is stunning and creepy as The Dust Witch). This is one of those special movies, like Burton's Sleepy Hollow, that could get by on atmosphere and spooky vibes but also manage to just be simply great.

The Witches Of Eastwick ★★★★

  I remember one of the first moments I felt a kind of simpatico with Roger Ebert was in reading this bit from his Practical Magic review: "too grown-up for children, too childish for grown-ups." Witches Of Eastwick is real grown-uppy while maintaining a childish whimsy that only George Miller could conjure. I had so much fun with this; a perfect cast, deliciously catty and sexy dialog, enduring direction (especially the car chase in the last act), and some gruesome effects make for such an entertaining movie.

God Told Me To ★★★★

  This completely stumped me - I have no idea what I feel, to be honest. There's a lot to peel back and flake away. It's not just unpredictable but the places it goes feel so unbelievable and insane. It's definitely disturbing and I respect it for taking the swerves that it does, just...lots to unpack. The flip-flopping I was doing, over and over, loving it, hating it, perplexed by it, unsettled by it, amused by it, annoyed it, baffled by it. Usually that's the mark of something truly great but I'm not sure where I stand. I went in expecting something along the lines of Q: The Winged Serpent and it starts that way but it eventually morphs into something else entirely. I appreciate being able to chew on something long after it's over.

Alligator ★★★★

  As far as Creature Features go, this isn't on the level of Jaws, the Blob remake, Tremors, or Nope but it's pretty close, about on par with Slugs. Strong direction, well-crafted effects, Robert Forster, and a pleasantly cynical script about animal testing & toxic waste anchor this movie that, otherwise, would be disposable and silly. I took too long to get around to this because of bad faith dismissiveness but I'm so glad I finally gave it a chance. Every shot of the 'gator looks great—occasionally creepy, even—and the last act is a fun showcase, especially if you just want to see nature as an antihero just fucking shit up for the bourgeoisie.

Salem's Lot ★★★★

  Scratched this one off the Tobe Hooper list and I continue to be enamored with his filmography. This is so dense, atmospheric, creepy and, occasionally, so tense that it's frustrating. The best stuff is the dialog and character beats, breathing with full chests because the 3-hour runtime gives them room. It's engrossing from beginning to end and perfect to throw on in the afternoon and let the dusk take you to the climax. Extra credit for the jagged ending that denies any easy resolution.

A Return To Salem's Lot ★★★★½

  Hahaha, well, okay: Salem's Lot is a spooky, character-driven, almost noirish folktale about vampires with an ever-deepening well of sadness that closes in around you in its 3-hour runtime. A Return To Salem's Lot is the complete opposite! In every way it does its own thing; funny/satirical, kooky, campy, and fucking brisk. Like, this fucker just soared by and, unless I was cackling or cheering, I generally had a huge grin on my face the entire time. It's about an anthropologist being tasked, by vampires, to write their Bible while his son is enchanted by their nocturnal way of life. The rest is insanely unpredictable bananatown cinema that only Larry Cohen could, would, and should make. There are so many strange pleasures and unintended charms that only grow in the compost heap of pure low-budget warts-'n-all entertainment; bad ADR, funny puppet monsters, odd line deliveries, and a complete disregard for the first movie. Larry Cohen carves his own path with some help from Michael Moriarty and an extra-surly Sam Fuller for one of the most enjoyable movies I've ever seen.

Terrifier 3 ★★★★½

  Yes, it's as sickening and brutal as you've heard but it's also a sincere portrait of PTSD and the True Crime parasites who feed on victims for 'Content'. It never reaches the highs of Zombie's cut of Halloween II but it's not far, either. Seeing Sienna and Jonathan as these cracked shards is so unexpectedly sad, which is a shade I never expected this franchise's greasepaint to have. And it won't get the recognition it deserves, but this one of the most gorgeous movies of the year, just absolutely stunning to look at. And the make-up effects are also worthy of awards they won't ever win. As much as I like the second movie, my biggest gripe was the sluggish pacing and this one wisely tightens things up. But, at the same time, it manages to be deliberately slower (with lots of great dissolves and cross-cutting). There's also a lack of humor; plenty of people were laughing during my screening but I found myself wincing and tense, especially the last act which was so upsetting that I was actually buzzing from adrenaline - I nearly left the theater. This gave me everything I wanted in a demon possession movie, unlike Late Night With The Devil, because it reaches a point where the movie itself feels evil. A huge step up from the sequel (and a leap from the first one), hopefully Leone continues to sharpen his craft for the next one.

The Sixth Sense ★★★★½

  Revisited this after about, I don't know, two decades and was floored. The editing is brilliant while, stylistically, this is one of Shyamalan's most striking movies and the script is achingly short of greatness. I say that because, while the twist is great (and foreshadowed in many clever, inspired ways), it happens too late: we see Malcolm realize he's dead and come to peace with it in a montage that's overwrought and a bit rushed. It's especially clunky because it comes after the Bee Pendant scene, with Cole and his Mom, which is the movie's true crescendo, so it feels like an afterthought. We should have gotten the twist reveal and then ended on Cole and his Mom, it would give the movie a much stronger punctuation mark. Other than that this is absolutely stellar; engaging, scary, and existentially rattling.

The Hidden ★★★★★

  Oh, I fucking loved this. It's as if Men In Black met Grand Theft Auto and is exactly as fun as that sounds. The way it marries sci-fi action schlock and earnest drama in a perfect union is remarkable. It's just absurd enough and just serious enough without ever slopping over on either side. The dialog is crisp, the characters are all well-rounded, the villain is a scene-stealing comic gem and the action is thrilling. One of the best action movies of the '80s, or any decade, for that matter. In absolute awe of this perfectly measured elixir of fizzy entertainment.