Cue Ennio...
Quentin loves his title scrolls (or used to). This card is the only one in his filmography that I’ve got gripes with (I even kinda dig the janky, low-fi Dogs credits). If I could, I would switch this text with Vol. 1’s (and adjust the numerical values accordingly) because Vol. 1 isn’t a movie I plan on revisiting much in the future. Quentin likes to re-edit his favorite movies for his own personal viewing pleasure, and so I wonder if he’d consider swapping these title cards to be a step too far.
An upgraded version of The Village’s title sequence (which didn’t make the cut because the movie doesn’t meet the other half of the criteria). The kick-ass soundtrack goes a long way, and hey: if you forget about context this could be an all-around kick-ass title sequence for a kids horror movie (which the title itself suggests, ironically). But it’s very not.
An unbalanced movie in general -- part hokey pastiche, part gritty human drama, and the opening prepares you for the wrong ‘part.’ Indeed, whenever the laughable aliens or their tripods aren’t on screen it’s one of Spielberg’s (and Cruise’s) contemporary highlights, which is thankfully most of the movie, but in order to enjoy it you have to wade through shit like this.
You might get away with that ‘TV noise’ visual effect (and the fart SFX accompanying it) in an early 2000s DVD menu animation, but a feature? It’s not even good enough for a TV spot. And considering how otherwise surreal the film is, the vanilla mediocrity of this opening comes across almost like surrealism in itself. *shrug*
This is a peculiar movie because on its surface it seems like many throwaway thrillers from the oughts (and it’s certainly directed like one), but when you dig into the writing you discover it contains some of the most fun psychological horror of any King adaptation (as well as some of the best casting). And that initial dismissiveness you might feel toward it is only compounded by its dime-a-dozen opening.
This could pass for an opening to a Home Alone film, and maybe somehow that’s the point? To kick off an ultraviolent love affair with a marimba, like, ironically? Cuz the title is also kinda subversive, y’know? But if so, then why set the opening against the nightmarish backdrop of Detroit in winter? The whole thing’s a tonal mess. “But the music fits Alabama’s voiceover perfectly!” Look, even her voiceover is somewhat problematic to me, okay? P.S. never underline your main title, just as a rule.
It was either gonna be this or The Thing, but at least The Thing’s main title card is cool enough to forgive the stupidity that precedes it: an unnecessary teaser of our alien antagonist flying its goofy-looking ship into Earth’s atmosphere. In both cases, I wish the film had just opened with a black screen (and beyond my personal preferences, it seems like logical filmmaking). In the case of Predator, specifically, the first image we see shoulda always been the helicopter silhouetted against the red skyline accompanied by Silvestri’s sinister theme. And on that note: why do we see the main title card before we hear that theme? Pfft.
Okay, I don’t hate this one; it’s more of a minor annoyance, but an annoyance all the same! There is no bigger Michael Mann stan in the world than Peter Berg - whose entire aesthetic is based exclusively on this movie - and this credit sequence (titles + music) feels like the opening to one of his lesser thrillers, like The Kingdom. That’s always kinda irked me and always will.
Great post! I don't often think of movie opening titles, usually just TV shows. I liked War of the Worlds but that title is definitely bad.
ReplyDeleteon True Romance: music from "Badlands" over establishing shots is the effective blend of Quentin/Tony that somehow works throughout.
ReplyDeleteon Insider: I think it's supposed to mimic the aesthetic of 60 Minutes. and in the scope of that movie, it's so noninvasive that I barely think about it.
on 1408: it deserves what it gets.